Avery Kate

Avery Kate was a healthy ten week old baby girl who went to sleep for a nap and woke up in Heaven. We miss her every second of every day. SIDS became a reality in our family and we will never forget our beautiful baby girl.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Our first full day with our baby girl

September 2, 2011. It was a Friday and we had many visitors coming in and out all day to visit and meet our newest addition. There were many times that I was left alone with her though, and for some reason I remember being really nervous. Why was I so nervous? I mean, I've done this before. What's different? It's like I knew something was different but couldn't put my finger on it. I noticed she acted like she was gagging sometimes, and it freaked me out. Her little chin shivered at times but I just assumed she may be cold. Her right leg also did the same shivering thing, but everyone told me this was all normal and she was OK. I know babies do things like this all the time, but for some reason, they worried me. I had shrugged these thoughts off knowing deep down that I was over reacting and my baby was just as perfect as everyone had told me.
More pleasant memories from that day are the times when I could just hold her and stare at her beautiful face. I can still close my eyes at this very moment and see her sleeping face on that day. I remember her "new baby" smell. Gosh, why don't they just bottle that stuff up and sell it! Isn't that smell just so comforting? It just reminds me of the innocence of a child. AMAZING!
Next they come to do the hearing test on Avery Kate. My good friend, Elise gave birth to baby Hunter back in March. It was then that they found out he deaf. These types of things never worried me before because they just don't happen to anyone you know. Well Hunter's situation really hit close to home. You can have a perfect pregnancy, perfect delivery, and perfect parents, but things can still go wrong. I was scared out of my mind when the nurse took her to do her hearing screening. I remember holding my breath unable to read her face. Finally I just asked her, "Is she doing OK?" And then I saw the smile...whew! She said, "She's doing just great." And then here come the waterworks! I know she thought I was crazy with tears rolling down my face after she assured me she was OK.
The rest of that day I held my baby close and gave her so many kisses. I just kept telling Brandon, "I just love her so much!" During my 9 month pregnancy I had often wondered how there would be any more room in my heart for another child. These moments proved that the heart is like a balloon and can hold more love than anyone can ever imagine.

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